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posted by sysrpl on Sunday April 30, 2006 5:06 PM

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If you're not a regular CSPAN watcher, you'll regret having missed the live broadcast of Stephen Colbert at the White House Correspondents Dinner last night. For those of unfamiliar with Colbert, he is the host of Comedy Central's faux news program 'The Colbert Report'. On the show Colbert plays the role of an ultra republican who ostensibly supports President Bush while regularly attacking the media for not 'feeling' the truth.

Your regret shall be short lived, as clips from the broadcast are already circulating around the Internet. I've gathered these clips together below. They're basically 30 mins of continuous uninterrupted mocking of the President, while he was sitting 10 feet away trying to pretend that everything was OK. Don't expect too many laughs from the dinner guests, as they are mostly shocked by what is being said.

Select quotes from the evening

On the President's recent personel changes: "[The press] writes they're just rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic. First of all, that is a terrible metaphor. This administration is not sinking. This administration is soaring. If anything, they are rearranging the deck chairs on the Hindenburg."

On supporting the President: "I stand by this man because he stands for things. Not only for things, he stands on things. Things like aircraft carriers and rubble and recently flooded city squares. And that sends a strong message, that no matter what happens to America, she will always rebound with the most powerfully staged photo ops in the world."

On the press: "As excited as I am to be here with the president, I am appalled to be surrounded by the liberal media that is destroying America, with the exception of Fox News. Fox News gives you both sides of every story, the President's side and the Vice President's side."

More on the press: "The President makes decisions, he's the decider. The Press Secretary announces those decisions, and you people of the press type those decisions down. Make, announce, type. Put them through a spell check and go home. Get to know your family again. Make love to your wife. Write that novel you got kicking around in your head. You know, the one about the intrepid Washington reporter with the courage to stand up to the administration. You know, fiction."

On the President's approval rating: "Pay no attention to the people who say the glass is half empty, because 32% means it's 2/3 empty. There's still some liquid in that glass is my point, but I wouldn't drink it. The last third is usually backwash."

On Iraq: "I believe the government that governs best is the government that governs least. And by these standards, we have set up a fabulous government in Iraq."

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Show Transcript


It should be obvious that anyone disagreeing with the current administration must clearly support a hidden liberal agenda, as evidenced by this rebuttal clip from Lou Dobb's conservative round table. Watch a wingnut evoke the memory of 9/11 to discredit Colbert while another drones the 'singe not burn' tagline. When will these idiots realize they cannot turn around public opinion simply by finding the magic talking point?

Evoking 9/11 to discredit Colbert?

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